"The Academy": Nursing Home for the Academic-Aged

Sorry for being so meager in the posting area...I dont' know why but for some reason it jsut hasn't been in me to write of late...That's actually a lie. I do know why. I would like to first make note of the wonderful, albeit anonymous, comment that was left on my last post. I really enjoyed reading it, of course relating to much of it. And it had a nice tone. I only wish I knew who posted it... And you know it's extremely annoying because I can't figure out how to start a new paragraph on this blog. So consider a new parapgraph begun. I often feel like I have been alive forever and at my young age I feel like I have already experienced a multitude of movements in thought and experience. I was sitting in my natural philosophy class today with an eclectic bunch of american college students and it struck me poignantly how old I have gotten. I mockingly chuckled inside silently at the eager student next to me who showed interest in picking the prof.'s brain for knowledge for he has yet to hold his own position and value his own thought more. He still pathetically approaches the educator like a lost sheep, a man possessing a thirst of which only someone who actually knows something could quench. He still views the world in a systematic catalogue of course-categories, his entire perception of knowledge reflected in the courses he has taken that he proudly mentions as a way to provide a sense of stability and validity for his thought and opinion, for himself. He thinks himself intelligent because he can take classes at expensive universities, because he can tell the prof. that he took a class that discussed the relationship between science and art and that the conclusion was that art is ultimately based on perception while science is ultimately based on a clear fact, to which the prof. responded, "well at least that's supposed to be the plan. And how did I appreciate her well-worded response. It was encouraging yet undermining and cynical simultaneously. And I liked her. It was the perfect blend of empathy with the human condition and appreciation and respect for all members of humanity since we are all specks of stardust (as my astronomy prof. likes us to recall often) and the protective and sweet facade of a serious, interested, and engaged thinker who has thought and negated and thoguht many times more all of the thoughts in the head of the 20 yr old standing in front of her. It was perfectly respectful all the while protecting her secrets. And I was struck by her persona. I think she did a good job. She gets an A. You see because I was mocking him. It struck me how uinversity is the time where people begin to think, and some don't start until the end, some never at all. (I don't know why but this was a novel concept to me...again-I do know why, bc that's me, but whatever, you get it.) And at some point later in life, after they have all entertained a multitude of ideas and drawn conclusions and correlations, after Aritstotle, Copernicus, Bruno, Galileo, Newton and Einstein, after the pomp and flair of academica has subsided and having risen themselves, the cloud of glory dissipates, they will get to the point of realization that all serious academics have to get to when they realize the lack of intense significance attached to anything and the pathetic-ness of position and formal academia. That all knowledge is somewhat trite, that thought occurs in patterns and that originality is perhaps nonexistent. And at best they just hopelessly continue, at worst, madly cast themselves into the basement on some arbitrary shelf with the Book of Sand, or escape into the cosmos, mentally or physically into some unknown blackhole. But that is not supposed to happen until later, after one is an accomplished academic. It hit me that my fellow students are in the beginning of the "discovery process", that many of them have not even begun it, and I stand on the other side next to my prof. annoyed by simplicity and simple passion and I feel old. Like this shuldn't be happening for another 20 yrs or something. And I only wonder, what comes next? Is it jsut a grander, richer experience of some previous stage of mine, or is there perhaps, maybe, something somewhere waiting for me that is new? I can't concieve of it, dont' believe it, but hope, just hope it is there, somewhere. In other news, my ankle is hurting in a new place and I'm nervous I injured a different tendon...shhh! Don't tell!! I started choreographing (wiht my coach that is) a new program to "Man in the Iron Mask". It's lovely if I may say so myself. And I want to get a telescope...except my parents are already getting me new blades for my birthday so I don't know how I'm going to work that one out...especially because if I'm going to get one I want to get a good one, otherwise I'll jsut end up getting another one later and that's a waste of money. Alright-over and out.